Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
Also I played a weird game of chicken in the ladies room at work between myself the person pooping 2 stalls over and a very determined maintenance man.
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
you said you were going to the bathroom. we found you an hour later laying in the backyard clutching a bottle of vodka while singing the beatles and crying
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
Randomize
