That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
So I'm drinking wine and watching Thumbelina
I'm teaching my cat to play fetch
Yep, it's a friday
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
I mean...if Marco gets pregnant, it is either the spawn of Satan or the second coming of Christ (neither of which I want in my life). So let's just hope that he doesn't grow a womb and that we don't have to consider either option.
IT WAS A FUCKING ELEPHANT I SWESR!!!!!
Nathan, I haven't spoken to you in 12 years and it's 6am. Kindly fuck off.
Randomize
