You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
When I blacked in, I was crying to my father at the swim-up bar that "I was going to win an Oscar." how do you THINK Mexico was?
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
You understand the drunkenness of my drunkenness
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
Randomize
