I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
I had to convince you not to write "happy birthday to the first guy who fingered me" on his facebook wall, right above the post from his current girlfriend's mother.
Most awkward car ride ever. Kid in the front seat was bawling, 2 in the backseat were ready to fight, and I was giving the last kid a handie. This needs to stop happening to us.
She had one of those kid princess beds. I asked how she expected to fuck on that and she just said "thats what the slide is for". I've never wanted to marry a one night stand before.
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
Wine and a Lunchable. That would be depressing if it wasn't the pepperoni and mozzarella one. Those are the shit!
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
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