That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
I'm way too drunk on a Sunday to handle this level of Jesus.
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
My roomate asked me why she found condoms in the pringles container. I don't know what to tell her
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
Randomize
