i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
Home-made laxative recipe: activia yogurt and tequila shots. Any ratio ought to work.
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
You've hit rock bottom, swam around the ocean floor, and brought back silverware from the titanic.
Just calling to thank you for not dying. I love you.
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
and then she asked if she could shave my junk
and howd that go?
can you pick me up from the hospital?
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