She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
I'm proud of us, I'm cleaning up the place and I haven't found a single beer can that isn't empty.
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
We don't watch enough power rangers
For our 1st date, he tried to schedule a rock climbing. I suggested, "how about we meet at my place and you can scale Mt. Vagina?"
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
Lo siento on account of my penis...
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
I'm naked, eating straight Nutella, and listening to "Make you feel my love" on repeat. So no. He didn't ask me out.
I have mystery bruises on my right knee, right arm, under my chin, and on my forehead. What the fuck happened last night??
Randomize
