I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
a girl just walked by me crying on the phone saying, "all I ever do is menstruate"
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
WHERE ARE MY FUCKING EYEBROWS?!
There are 144 bottles of wine in my mother's pantry. She just shrugged her shoulders and said it was for the wine pong tournament on Christmas Day.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
Is it weird that I have your number saved in my phone as baby Jesus?
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
You asked him if he would have sex with you under the dinosaur. He declined and then you started crying, blaming the sand.
Randomize
