White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
Just realized my relationship wasn't even Facebook official and I'd already cheated on him. 'Shitty girlfriend' is an understatement.
i was sitting in the back of a squad car completely stoned watching airplanes take off
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
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