I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
You're the reason why I want to be a better drunk
I just did a booty-call caliber shave job in preparation for this weekend. Fuck being ladylike; I'm tryna get LAID-ylike
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
Drunk me just want to text sober me for saving that half rack of ribs I loves you
Randomize
