hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
I woke up on a futon in some strangers house. They were eating pizza and told me everything was going to be fine.
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
I just saw a girl drinking wine and walking her dog in footie pajamas and a mad hatter hat. First day of the new year and I think I'm in love.
I feel like you should put up a missed connections ad for this..
I just matched with a taco on tinder. Dreams come true.
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
Randomize
