508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
Note to self: don't jizz on a surface cleaned with Tilex. It WILL turn purple.
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
Some guy stole lobsters by hiding them in his pants. We should strive to be like him.
No he didn't understand the sequence...then I started texting him these texts with vagina strategically spelt correctly in jumbles of letters.
we are blowing up condoms and making balloons and we’re drunk on the floor. You could have come to school here
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
Come over. I have beer, your weird ass vegan pizza, and a raging hard on.
Marry me.
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Randomize
