you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
my dealer just handed me my weed in a pink easter egg
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
Found Ryan’s keys in the fridge. On my way back.
Also, tell him he missed Nathan passing out in the dryer.
Randomize
