love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
My mom just got knocked over by a rollerblader. I'm trying not to laugh, bc my family looks pretty concerned
she called me screaming that i shouldn't ignore her phone calls, because she's not trying to get me to hang out with her and she doesn't want to be my girlfriend, she just wants sex.
what did you do?
i asked her out. that's so hot.
Almost accidentally stole a baby... explain later
they just named my boobs. Lefty is "Guenevere" and Righty is "I claim this boob for America"
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
Randomize
