Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
why is my clorox wipe dispenser full of tortillas?
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
Would it be in bad taste to ask Marky Mark to sign the vibrator I named after him?
she just called me the flavor packet to her ramen noodles. get me the fuck out of here.
I fill condoms, not promises.
You kept trying to make people drink "salsa-ritas." But all you did was dump tequila in a half full jar of salsa, and shove it in people's faces while shouting at them.
My roommate just walked in with a case of beer locked himself in his room and told us he was going to masturbate his feelings away...
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
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