David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
The vibrator you gave me is probably the one thing I will never give up if we got robbed at gunpoint
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
I'm writing my will in case I die this week, it'll be saved on my computer under: little 500 death scenario
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
Yeah dude I should be out of the ER in about an hr. They gave me vallium. Go tell the captain its time to set sail.
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
Taking Gomer to the ER. He tore something trying to stretch his nutsack enough to put his balls in his own ass. I need new friends.
I should've been more social I guess. I feel bad not meeting the people who willingly sucked alcohol out of my navel...
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
Randomize
