So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
Please come pick me up? I sleep walked to planned parenthood again.
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
The dog threw up again, this time IN the toilet. I've taught him well.
Played "Which Couple Will Take Me Home Tonight" at the bar last night... I can now cross three-some off my bucket list
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
I need a rain check on breakfast. A frat boy said it was his dream to sleep with a MILF, I made his dream come true and he made me cum
There is no way I’m wasting 21 year old morning wood
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
Randomize
