the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
i just wanna skin you and wear you like last years versace.
you may have the big hair, fake nails, and talk with a fake accent, but you will NEVER be a housewife from new jersey so STOP TRYING.
So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
mom just texted me "hawaii ambien". those are like the two things she talks about to keep me interested in spending time with her.
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
ders ninda duuude pooring goden shots ov glory. I see em an i dont but there hear.
are you attempting voice recognition while drunk again?
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
I was doing handstands in the jail cell and crying “IM A HIGH SCHOOL TEACHER AND IT’S CHRISTMAS EEEEEVE”
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