I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
I hope the prosecutor is a dude cause my lawyer is hot.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
My mail consisted of a box of dildos and christmas card from grandma.
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
No, no... it's pale and surrounded by awkward, curly, red hair. It's the Ronald McDonald of penises.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
Ted is on HBO in 20 minutes...not sure if this or the drunken dance party I had at the bar to a N*SYNC Christmas song 20 minutes ago is the highlight of my week so far.
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
Randomize
