I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
Just got escorted to my 7:45 class by an old woman because I was too hungover to not realize I was four floors too high.
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
Just sent my mother the text "we need to get our vaginas looked at this thursday". Hows your day going?
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
For the record, if you sneeze while you have a dildo in your vagina and you dont have a good grip on it, that thing can get some distance.
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