fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
Bank of America texted me 7 times in 12 hours to say my balance was below $50. I kept transfering money back in. Then I texted my bank saying that it was okay, i knew what I was doing.
I told her I'd give her some of the cream I was using so she didn't get my warts. That's when I realized I was too drunk.
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
You're gonna be proud in the future that you fucked the next bill gates
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
Welp, I've officially cried in every Chipotle bathroom in the city. Correlation or causation?
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
I got drunk. Then I took a shit.
It was a good shit
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