he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
apparently the secret to your success is patron
Whyyyyy do my fingers smell like Chinese food.
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
Go christen that room with your naked body.
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
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