Do you realize that we tried to rent a limo at 5am to come and take us to waffle house?
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
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