Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
It took him longer to undo my bra than he lasted..
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
I just saw a bunch of drunk old guys riding on the side of a modified old fire truck yelling at cars and smoking while they looked for parking...promise we will be just like them when we grow up?
I'm craigslisting fire trucks as we speak
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
Randomize
