...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
When's the best time to point out that all of my orgasms this year have been self-administered? Valentine's day?
Also I just took the BEST ass selfie of my adult life.... it's gonna be a good day haha
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
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