I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
it hurts more in the daytime
my mom walked in on me smoking weed alone, listening to the eagles, and just staring at the river. she totally knew.
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
rethinking that breast reduction surgery... i'm tired of drunkenly explaining the scars to guys who don't really give a shit
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
That reminds me of that one time you handcuffed me to a table leg while I was reaching for the vodka.
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
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