I'm jealous of your bromance
I've been at work for less than an hour and have pooped twice already. That's what happens when you start sleeping with your roommate and don't want to use the bathroom at home anymore.
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
Why would I send you a picture of it when I could just steal the gnome and put it in your bed with you? Admit it, he looks just like gnomeo!
all law school has taught me so far is how to fart quietly during lectures and how to out-argue the ice cream guy when he screws me out of extra toppings.
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
Also the bouncer Straight up told me my id was shitty and I should get a new one. But he let me in anyways because #boobz
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
soo... how was my night?
For some reason, my alarm clock was unplugged & in the kitchen microwave. I don't remember doing that...
I’m going to give his broken heart CPR with my vagina
Randomize
