plz talk dirty to me
Also, i'm pretty sure i've had my birth control pill stuck in my throat since like...two pm. So i'll be practicing safe oral sex tonight.
I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee
please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
I just realized I'm currently not eating carbs, drinking alcohol or having sex. 2014 is off to a horrible start.
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
And I’m prepared, because I'm in it to win it (and by win I mean get railed hard)
Randomize
