You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
You're a goddess. Probably of destruction and dick jokes, or some shit, but man, lesser bitches wish they could be half as fab.
I hear jingle bells and I can't tell if it's bc I'm feeling festive or just REALLY high
If Dr Phil has taught me anything about myself, it’s that I can seriously relate to those women who fake their pregnancies.
Randomize
