i fell asleep last night with fifteen animal crackers in my mouth. rock bottom dude.
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
I just spent the last 30 mins playing uplifting songs to my uterus, & there's no way I'm pregnant.
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
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