Everytime she opens her mouth it's like a fucking terrorist attack on my life.
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
I wish I could donate my sober boners to my whiskey dick
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
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