they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
I ended up naked in a pond with you-know-who and your saying your a good babysitter? Dick.
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
Just had a 10 minute long conversation with my cat about how if I died, and he needed to eat me to live, I'd totally be ok with it. Definitely still drunk.
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
I never actually go in the club. I get in line, hit on a chick, and convince her to come drink all she wants for free at my house.
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
Had a dream last night that we survived the apocalypse. And we celebrated Christmas.
What did I get you?
A 12 gauge and a bottle of vodka that was waist high.
Sounds about right
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
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