So I'm banging this nun...
Isn't that how all good stories start? I like it already...
Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
A girl just asked me to co-sign for her boob job because she didn't have enough credit built up. This is a first.
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
I told a 250 pound football player I would catch him if he jumped into my arms. And that is how I broke my wrist
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
Randomize
