Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
the coke olympics were a bad idea. there's a tree uprooted in the front of my building.
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
Apparently drunk me was getting hit on and i wasn't into it so i shouted "Stupify" at him like i was fucking harry potter then went to the pizza place next to the bar and punted some guys pizza box out of his hands. :(
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
Randomize
