The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
Why did I see a weird snapchat of you barking at McDonald's last night?
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
she was sitting on the toilet asking for me to take a "cute facebook profile picture" for her
Listen, she cheated on him first. I've known both of them since we were 12. They have no secrets from me. And yes, as a matter of fact, I absolutely did enjoy screaming out his name into his, soon to be, ex wife's pillow.
Randomize
