are you serious? he told me he had to cancel bc his grandma came into town
well unless his grandma is 21 and blonde, HE LIED TO YOU IDIOT
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
I'm gonna cougar town the shit out of that prom.
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
If there's one thing I think I could really excel it, it's curating a midlife crisis
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
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