Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
What do you mean you don't pregame your bikini waxes?
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
I found a horn on the street but it's okay I disinfected it with vodka
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
I CAN CONTROL MY GERBIL WITH MY BREATH. HE FOLLOWS THE SMELL. PROBABLY WOULDNT BE AS EXCITING IF I WASNT HIGH OFF MY ASS, BUT STILL
I'm sorry but I require more work than your hamster. I need food, a minimum of 5 pillows, and I need to be played with daily.
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
Who knew that the guy I fucked on your front lawn during welcome week freshman year would turn out to be my husband
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
The cop told you he couldn't let you pee. You just pulled your pants down and squared anyway and im surprised you didnt get arrested.No more drinking for you.
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
Randomize
