There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
Dude I'm so clean right now. Like I feel insulted that I can pass a piss test.
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
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