First night home from college and I already forgot that walking around nearly naked with my laptop open to smut porn isn't acceptable. Sorry, mom.
i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
Just woke up bloody and clutching a rear view mirror I'm pretty sure is from my car. For those of you keeping score at home this is why I stopped drinking four loko.
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
WHY WERE YOU COOKING NAKED?
WHY WERE YOU SLEEPING ON MY COUCH?
Guess who just bought an ounce of pot via Paypal, and paid for it with my airline Visa card to earn miles?
Congratulations. That business degree is finally worth every penny it cost you.
Binging muscle relaxers because when ur 33 you can no longer SHAKE IT LIKE A POLAROID PICTURE for 2hrs w/o consequences. Fuck you, Age.
Wait you actually sent a text to your self saying “love you I miss you"?
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
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