I was going to clean my house but wine sounded better
Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
Randomize
