That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
I just handed a girl a slice of pizza and she handed me her number. Is this how Vegas hookups normally begin?
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
All I remember about last st pattys day was I was in a bathtub with full bubbles, fully clothed, drinking out of a flamingo lawn ornament that someone cut a hole in.
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
But being sober is boring. Everything takes so long, I feel like I'm just waiting in line to die.
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
Randomize
