don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
My wrist bandage is guacamole stained. What an accurate representation of my life as a whole
How in the hell did I take a shot of whiskey to the eyeball last night?
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
Randomize