I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
if i died would you start the facebook group?
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
It's OK, I woke up in a drag queen's bed last weekend. It took me forever to get the glitter out of my cleavage.
Like sometimes I’ll be hangry but for dick
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
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