i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
He walked into the bar right as I was licking the shotglass clean. We made eye contact for way too long..
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
this morning's inventory: a top hat, two empty bottles of everclear, half a slim jim, cigars, tiara, pot necklace, and some fishnets. and that's just my purse.
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
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