Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
So hungover and decided to eat a burrito and a pot brownie for dinner, this is what adulthood looks like.
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
When was the last time you got laid?
When was the last time you came home sober?
touche
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