I threw up so much beer last night that my puke had a nice head on it.
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
The poop emoji wasn't even in my recents. Does that mean I'm growing up?
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize
