ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
Just in case the world ends tomorrow, I have an emergency contact group of booty calls I can send a quick "let's fuck" to before I die.
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
Randomize
