Its about making memories worth repressing
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
I shit you not, me and my date were in that bar and within a 10 minute window, 4 ex gf's entered. Every one clocked me and gave me evils. I swear they're conspiring.
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
All I have done at work today is eat and try to get my coworker to tie me to his bed again
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
Also I know you probably did not understand anything I said on the phone last night but thank you for pretending.
You ever fart so bad at work that you think about taking a sick day just to spare your coworkers from the savage olfactory beating they are about to receive?
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
Randomize
