Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
Yeah. Let's save our goodbyes for when I'm obnoxiously and embarrassingly drunk and more than likely naked.
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
The Wolf of Wall Street “I ain’t fuckin’ leaving!” speech when the cops broke up your party though...
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
Randomize
