its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
You told me that you only walk into walls because it makes the room stop spinning.
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
URGENT INPUT I'm at a renesance fair after party and I'm 100% lined up to fuck their sword swallower OR their contortionist. Dont say both - which direction doth I roll?
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
I'm a bit broke right now... Would it be OK if I pay you in champagne and Xanax?
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
Randomize
